Lexxy Fancypants

Last night I dreamed I was married to Prowl and Jazz. WHY DID I WAKE UP

( No really, it was wild, there was a murder mystery and everything. And SUDDENLY TELEPORTATION )

Finished my Ecology report and my OrgChem prelab! yesssss. Let's ignore the stuff I didn't do yet. I want to bask in this glow for a bit.

You all should check out my darling twin's Hookermus Prime fic. It is indulgent and hilarious and OH MEGATRON YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD. Optimus is a very high-class kind of escort thank you very much. Seriously, it's lovely - if it sounds at all like your cup of tea, please go read it and tell her how lovely it is. And it's the first of four! Go go read it nowww~

Completely unrelatedly, I just gotta pimp therightoflol some more. Best RP ever homg. Wheeljack and Bluestreak showed up for the first time last night, and it was adorable. Even more adorable was Skywarp and Scorponok doing the GOOD DOG, BEST FRIEND dance. Basically Wheeljack's thread was amazing and you should read it. Especially this part, where Scorponok has the BEST TIMING EVER. Seriously they're so cute. It's ridiculous and I want to cuddle them both.

One day I will have time to actually assemble a recs list. Sigh. But for now, I need to get back to work.

I keep my Transformers on the upper level of my desk, peeking over my monitor. Shockwave is the only one that's bipedal right now because when I was visiting Ally I transformed ALL THE TRANSFORMERS. SEVERAL TIMES. WITHOUT INSTRUCTIONS. That was a lot of Transformers. I am transforminged out.

So there's Shockwave. Yesterday I adjusted his hips so that he was standing with his weight on both feet instead of listing to one side. Then I had him aim his gun cannon in a vague direction - towards the window, really. Because Shockwave is creepy.

I just looked up.

He's aiming right at me.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

1. Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2. I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3. You'll update your journal with my five questions, and your five answers.
4. You'll include this explanation.
5. You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed

My questions from justbolts:

1) If you could name one thing you love about TFA Shockwave, what would it be and why?
Oh good lord, only one thing? Alright, to narrow it down I will give myself more rules: nothing about his alter-ego, nothing that breaks the 4th wall (i.e. not his voice acting although HNNNGH I LOVE IT), and no explicit spoilers. Ah, it's still so difficult! Alright, I have it: his delicacy. Shockwave is BIG, there is no denying that - he had to seriously compress his mass to get even vaguely Autobot-sized, and that form is about 2/3 Shockwave's height. He's smaller than Megatron but that's not saying much, EVERYONE is smaller than Megatron. So Shockwave is huge, okay, and he's reasonably bulky (if also a bit lanky) and yet - he has these beautiful slender claws which he uses to perform brain surgery. *fans self* It's pretty much a physical manifestation of all the best things about him. He's big, he's strong, he's calculating, he's precise, and it's all devoted to Megatron. Hell yes.

2) What movie or type of movie have you always wanted to see, but Hollywood has continuously failed to make it for you?
A smart action movie. I don't mean one that has a good explanation for the explosions, I mean one that is made mindfully with more than a token consideration of race, gender, and other issues. Action heroes are bulky straight white guys. If there is a woman in the lead role, she's a sex object. Come ooooonnnnn. :<

3) By the same token, what's something (theme, message, acknowledgment of) that you'd want out of future Transformers movies, that the previous ones lacked?
What would I want in future Transformers movies... I want the Transformers as an alien race with their own culture. The fans are so thoughtful about these things - I read a story where Jazz was once a building component, but he essentially had a sex change and now functioned as a singular being. I've read stories that actually deal with the fact that their culture is a theocracy. We don't have to humanize them to make them sympathetic. I'm tired of the non-bipedal ones being considered nonsentient. I want little moments like someone mentioning Primus and someone else makes a gesture (read a story where it was a circle over the spark, mimicking the Matrix). I want to know how they choose alt-modes, whether fliers are always flier and grounders always grounders and whether there's social tiers based on that. I want to know about their hierarchy, both before the war and in the factions. There's so much I want to know! Enough peeing on people, enough with the human gestures (snorting, spitting, arrrgh), enough with "Autobots are good because they like humans and Decepticons are bad because they're trying to restore their planet", I want to know about the robots! I am watching Transformers because it's about robots! DO YOU THINK I MIGHT WANT TO SEE MORE ABOUT ROBOTS?! aaaaahhhhhh

And that is why I write fanfic. :D

4) If there were only three types of meals you could eat for the rest of your life, what would they be?
Three types of meals... Well I pretty much am restricted to three types of meals. XD I can eat vegetables, poultry, and seafood. Can't eat anything out of a box, can't eat other meats, can't eat corn syrup. I'm lactose intolerant (but I eat cheese and yogurt anyway, they're low in lactose) and I'm extremely sensitive to caffeine. Can't eat processed sugars. So yeah - my answer is vegetables, poultry, and seafood. XD

5) If you suddenly got an all expenses paid trip to anywhere in the world, where would it be to?
You know, I'm not one of those people who wants to travel. I don't really want to see the Grand Canyon, I have little interest in the Caribbean, cruise ships sound boring... So I'm going to go with Pripyat. I really, really do want to visit Pripyat and Chernobyl. I am desperately intrigued by the biological stuff going on - I want to know if the mutations of the pines are genetic, or whether it's due to constant exposure to the cracked sarcophagi of the Red Forest. I want to visit that creepy ferris wheel, and I want to meet the people who live there. It's not a wasteland. It's teeming with life - plant and animal and human. It's beautiful and terrible.

Soooo sometimes I draw. I suck at it. It's fun anyway.

This is my first time drawing Shockwave(or any robot lol), done with a laptop trackpad in MS Paint. It sucks. I kinda like it anyway.



Outtake~ which was actually saved before the one above, lololol



I use the trackpad with my middle finger. I CAN'T FEEL IT ANYMORE. There are all kinds of issues with these (aside from being drawn in MS FRIGGING PAINT) but I can't bring myself to give a flying fuck. It's 2:30 in the morning and when I started it was 10:30.



Oh wait I lied, I drew the only gay eskimo a while ago:

He tried to have a Pride Parade. He was the only one who showed up. This is why he hates you all.

I need an animated icon that says this:
THIS IS FANDOM. YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT. YES, EVEN THAT. REVEL IN IT, MY FRIENDS.

Here, have my favorite joke in the world. I will transcribe on request if anyone needs it.

Ally: ... let's put it this way, it has never before been easier to shut him the hell up.
L: heeee
L: I can actually imagine him getting bored of his own voice in that situation
Ally: omg yes
L: I mean, all he can do is move his mouth
L: he can only talk so much
Ally: Which, even for him, could get boring.
L: yesss

AND THEN DIALOGUE-FIC HAPPENED. Filthy, sticky, disembodied semi-dub-con fic. I. What. I don't even. It's not my fault they keep leaving him on waist-height counters!
( Spoilers for Transformers Animated season 3, RE: Starscream. )