lex: (Default)
Comment to this post, and I will list seven things I want you to talk about. They might make sense or they might be totally random. Then post that list, with your commentary, to your journal. Other people can get lists from you, and the meme merrily perpetuates itself.

Read more... )
lex: (Default)
Day 6: How do you interact with readers' responses (or lack thereof)?
All the days. )

Dealing with comments has always been hard for me. I do not take praise well, particularly unspecified praise or personal praise. For example: "you are amazing and fantastic" puts me straight into violent negation and avoidance, "this story is wonderful" puts me into less violent avoidance, and "I liked the part where ____" makes me pause and admit yes, okay, I liked that part too. My emotional responses are so strong that I get overwhelmed very easily. This doesn't mean I want to not get comments - not at all! I love knowing that people are reading and enjoying what I write, and a non-commenting reader is an invisible reader. But it does mean that I have a tendency to get very, very socially awkward and overly effusive when responding.

So, as you folks reading this probably know, I put in a policy for myself pretty recently: put in exactly what I get. If the comment is "nice story!" I say "thank you" and that is IT. Nothing else. If they specify what they liked, I can respond similarly, and oh man I have gotten some awesome friends out of the conversations that resulted. I LOVE that. And by limiting my responses elsewhere, I actually have the energy and wherewithal to be able to have those awesome conversations.

So yeah, gonna keep that up - it is working really well for me. If I keep having strong issues, I may put up a small notes on each fic asking that any potential praise be directed at the story and not at me. I know people mean well, but it is very upsetting and makes me physically sick to be told I'm awesome. My issues, let me show you them. (I am actually getting increasingly sick writing this, just thinking of all the times people have been like "L YOU ARE THE BEST EVER." I... am reasonably sure most people do not have this problem!)

***

In other news, carpal tunnel sucks but sleeping with a wrist brace on really does help. I at least have enough sensation and control to be able to type. That was getting pretty damn difficult last night. Things that your fingers do when the nerves controlling them are being squished: NOTHING! XD God I hate being organic.

And for being good and reading all of that, I shall give you a whole scene (A WHOLE SCENE!) of a thing I started writing when I was having one of those awesome post-fic conversations with Katarik: Read more... )
lex: (idk my bff megatron)
Day 5: When do you write what kinds of fanfics? All the days. )

When I'm so upset or angry that I can't see straight or verbalize it (which is quite the accomplishment, let me tell you - I can speak calmly right up until I am literally restraining myself from committing murder) I write Sunstreaker. Sunstreaker being miserable, Sunstreaker being angry, Sunstreaker being comforted... Just Sunstreaker. He's my center. At the root of all things is Sunstreaker.

When I feel good I write things I find pleasure in. It might be Shockwave/Blurr darkfic, Prowl/twins epic, Skyfire/Starscream crack, Skyfire/trine porn... doesn't matter what it is as long as I can enjoy it. I usually bounce around between things when I feel good, unlike when I feel bad and just sit down and pound out a short Sunstreaker thing.

When I'm sad I write little small reflections that are also sad. Like, idk, Bluestreak sitting in the rain on Earth and talking about watching it fall on a battlefield on Cybertron and having to keep under cover from the Decepticons even though the acid was eating away at injured comrades who couldn't crawl to safety. I would write something like that.

If I feel cracky I'll actually attempt to draw instead of write, for some reason. Always in MS Paint. Seriously, I can't draw in regular drawing programs or on paper, I need that pixellation. I despise the version of MS Paint that came with Windows 7, though. Seriously wtf is that bullshit with the smooth lines omg. Gimme my pixels.

But really, my mood matters less than my groove. If the groove is going, I write. If it isn't, like the last month or so, I don't. Luckily it turns out [personal profile] spacehussy and I have pretty much the same writing cycles, and if one of us starts to write it usually triggers the other into writing which gets the first one going again and then we're on a roll for a while. I used to have year-long dry spells, and now I have month-long dry spells. Because we're awesome.

Seriously how did I get such an awesome Spacehussy of my very own. ♥ She's so awesome, you guys. I can't even tell you how neat the stuff she comes up with is. I can't wait to show you all Disassembled and the Trinefic and everything else she (and I) are working on. It's going to be amazing.
lex: (blah blah)
Day 4: Do you feel you have a writing style? The rest of the days. )

Short answer: yes, but it's mutable.

Cut for length. )
lex: (blah blah)
Day 3: What character archetypes do you enjoy (or hate) writing? )

I love the semi-feral persons. I love sentient nonhumans (oh boy do I love them wink wink nudge nudge say no more). I love the sociopaths and psychopaths. I almost never really like the main characters - they exist to be the foil for the characters I DO like. I hate the standard Japanese archetypes: the cute girl who NYAAAAs a lot, the crazy left-handed evil, the seme and uke, the badass big-breasted woman, the weeping and blushing. Not my culture. It is the culture that a lot of fandom is first exposed to, though, and it shows. God does it show. Not that Western culture is better: the helpless woman, the mustache-twirling ridiculous villain, the charismatic leader with grandiose speeches... I will be honest, I only love Optimus for his voice. If he didn't have such a fine voice I wouldn't have given him the time of day, but as it stands I adore him. I guess basically I don't like the traditional roles.

So I've been thinking about food, specifically what I can and can't eat. I've been reacting to something lately and I'm not sure if it's me being lax or whether, as I've suspected pretty much all along, I honestly am intolerant of corn. I thought it was just corn products, the really processed crap, but... I am beginning to suspect it's ALL corn. Shit. Do you know how hard it is to remove corn from your diet? Corn, beef, pork, dairy... Next thing you know I'll be reacting to wheat and soy. Sigh. So, time to get stricter on myself - no corn products for at least a week and see if things improve.

Sometimes I really hate food.
lex: (blah blah)
Day 2: What themes or patterns do you write? )

Huh. This one is tough.

I tend to erase female roles. I tend to focus on violent, uncontrolled characters. I tend to sensationalize the unknown. I tend to romanticize disabilities.

These are not terribly good things to do, really. They're all things I am actively working on. So they're the things I've noticed as patterns in my own writing.

Alright, how about themes? Hm. I try to take a "realistic" look at things that are not realistic at all. I give characters a weird mix of fluff and angst. I used to write about small moments, but gradually I've moved into attempting plots and action. I use a variety of styles depending on the emotional palette of the fic. If given a choice between happyfuntimes and grimdarkangst I will probably go for the grimdarkangst.

I often wonder what themes other people see in my writing.

***

In other news, Nostalgia is cuter than ever. Every morning I go off to school, I follow a certain pattern, which involves saying good bye to her, telling her to be good, and kissing her on the nose. Every other time I go to kiss her, she pulls back, but when we are saying bye for the day she always reaches out and bumps her nose against my lips. ADORABLE. And when I come home, she is waiting on my chair at the table and comes running to greet me the moment I'm in the door. And when I wake up, she is there next to my feet, ready to climb onto my chest and purr me to death. I kind of adore her. ♥
lex: (blah blah)
Okay, I came up with a mirror to [personal profile] sharpest_asp's meme. Have at it! XD

Day 1: What are you responding to or inspired by when you write fanfic?
Day 2: What themes or patterns do you write?
Day 3: What character archetypes do you enjoy (or hate) writing?
Day 4: Do you feel you have a writing style?
Day 5: When do you write what kinds of fanfics?
Day 6: How do you interact with readers' responses (or lack thereof)?
Day 7: Once it's posted, how do you interact with your story?

My Day 1 )

Soooo yeah, yesterday was kinda awful but I saw down with my darling twin and asked Prowl how to do my homework and suddenly everything is working out. LOGIC: IT WORKS, BITCHES. So yeah, I don't even really mind that I'm running on 6 hours of sleep when I wanted 9. Just turn on the mental Prowl voice, hell yeah. RECHARGE IS FOR THE WEAK.

Man I am making inspirational posters all up in here

the moral of the story is that Prowl is awesome
lex: (Default)
There was just a juvenile crow at my feeder! I am kinda ridiculously excited by this. Crows are my favorites.

My homework tactics yesterday worked surprisingly well, even though they did take all day - I did like 90% of my Physics homework, and now I only really need to do my lab reports. For Ecology, that's just two paragraphs about invasive species, though for Chem it's the analysis and conclusions from the distillation procedure. :\ I gotta do some research to figure out how to find the proportions of the chemicals and whatnot. I hate chemistry, I really do. Can't wait to take some actual biology classes. You know, since I'm a Biology major.

but I have had precisely two biology classes ever

and they were at my last school

this is so stupid

Day 7 – When you do comment, how do you handle the author response or lack of it? )

I'm thinking about coming up with the writer's version of this meme. Hmmm. It's actually been kinda weird to talk about fanfic from the reading side.
lex: (blah blah)
I think I may have Day 5 open on my other computer, in which case I will post it later and today will be BACKWARDS DAY! Goodness gracious do I love having Thursdays off, I sleep in and then get all giddy. XD

Day 6 – When do you read what kinds of fanfics? )

In other news, school is picking up. Tuesdays and Wednesdays are insanely long (goddamn labs) but I have Thursdays off entirely, which is GLORIOUS. I am going to cook and then do about a million homeworks. I have to write a lab report (full and proper lab report mind you, all "25mL of methanol/water mixture were placed in a 50mL round-bottom flask with 5 boiling chips and heated on a mantle at variac setting 5.5" blah blah blah), a couple paragraphs on invasive species, a buttload of online physics homework like seriously omg so much, and a bunch of organic chemistry problems to prepare for the quiz tomorrow. The report is the most important thing, I think, and then the physics homework.

Speaking of invasive species, my ecology teacher walked us through the ravine on campus and basically talked at us - I was super excited the whole time though, because I was like THAT'S BURDOCK, YOU CAN EAT IT and then he was like "this is burdock" and I was like FUCK YESSSSSS. We have an American Elm on campus! I almost wet myself with excitement! AMERICAN ELM. FUCK YES. And Dawn Redwood! And when he stopped by a staghorn sumac and was like "how many individuals are here" I was like ONE, MOTHERFUCKER, AND YOU CAN MAKE JUICE FROM THE BERRIES. FUCK YEAH.

PLANTS. SO EXCITING.
lex: (Default)
Day 5 – What kind of comments do you use for feedback and why? )

I want a nap, not 10 straight hours of classes. ;_; At least I had my twin's delicious squash soup to fill my tummy. Mmmmm. I think I might be getting the urge to work on Glory again. Maybe. Kinda. XD Trying not to jinx it.
lex: (yeah toast)
Comment on this entry and I'll tell you...

1. Something I'll learn about you by looking at your LJ page for 13 seconds.
2. Which color metal or number you remind me of.
3. My first memory of you. Something that reminds me of you as I go about my day.
4. What Transformer you remind me of.
5. Ask you something I've always wondered about you.
6. My favorite thing about you.
7. Give you a weird nickname.
8. What's on my shirt right now. Something unexpected in my bedroom.
9. Challenge you to post this on your journal
lex: (Default)
I FIGURED IT OUT! I FIGURED IT ALL OUT!

What, you say?

EVERYTHING! WHY EVERYTHING SUCKS What happened to Skyfire in G1! He just kinda fades out, right, he has his episode in the spotlight and then he's an overly cheerful taxi until Omega Supreme shows up and then he's just - not there any more. Okay so this is how it goes.

Skyfire joins the Autobots. But he was a Decepticon, and close to Starscream, and you don't really trust someone like that. And he's never been a social guy and he doesn't quite know how to reach through that kind of distance, though he tries. Have you noticed that half the time when they're looking for him, he's out flying around? (haha especially in the episode where everyone turns evil.) He does that, he goes out and flies and angsts, because it's better than being trapped inside the Ark with the Autobots and it's WAY better than being trapped with the Decepticons. But he feels he has a responsibility to the Autobots still. So he stays.

And then Omega Supreme comes, and they don't need him anymore, and he leaves. He just flies away.

LOOK I APPLIED LOGIC TO THE WRITERS FORGETTING HE EXISTED :D I'M SO EXCITED

Name a character and I'll tell you four facts about them from my own personal headcanon. You can ask me in general for a certain continuity or you can ask specifically about a certain fic verse I've written. Name as many characters as you want.

I'm good for Transformers, clearly, but also Final Fantasy 7 and... no, that's really it. I've lost all interest in my prior fandoms. ASK AWAY~
lex: (killing helicopters with cars)
1. Leave a comment, saying you want to be interviewed.
2. I will respond; I'll ask you five questions.
3. You'll update your journal with my five questions, and your five answers.
4. You'll include this explanation.
5. You'll ask other people five questions when they want to be interviewed


My questions from [personal profile] justbolts:

1) If you could name one thing you love about TFA Shockwave, what would it be and why?
Oh good lord, only one thing? Alright, to narrow it down I will give myself more rules: nothing about his alter-ego, nothing that breaks the 4th wall (i.e. not his voice acting although HNNNGH I LOVE IT), and no explicit spoilers. Ah, it's still so difficult! Alright, I have it: his delicacy. Shockwave is BIG, there is no denying that - he had to seriously compress his mass to get even vaguely Autobot-sized, and that form is about 2/3 Shockwave's height. He's smaller than Megatron but that's not saying much, EVERYONE is smaller than Megatron. So Shockwave is huge, okay, and he's reasonably bulky (if also a bit lanky) and yet - he has these beautiful slender claws which he uses to perform brain surgery. *fans self* It's pretty much a physical manifestation of all the best things about him. He's big, he's strong, he's calculating, he's precise, and it's all devoted to Megatron. Hell yes.

2) What movie or type of movie have you always wanted to see, but Hollywood has continuously failed to make it for you?
A smart action movie. I don't mean one that has a good explanation for the explosions, I mean one that is made mindfully with more than a token consideration of race, gender, and other issues. Action heroes are bulky straight white guys. If there is a woman in the lead role, she's a sex object. Come ooooonnnnn. :<

3) By the same token, what's something (theme, message, acknowledgment of) that you'd want out of future Transformers movies, that the previous ones lacked?
What would I want in future Transformers movies... I want the Transformers as an alien race with their own culture. The fans are so thoughtful about these things - I read a story where Jazz was once a building component, but he essentially had a sex change and now functioned as a singular being. I've read stories that actually deal with the fact that their culture is a theocracy. We don't have to humanize them to make them sympathetic. I'm tired of the non-bipedal ones being considered nonsentient. I want little moments like someone mentioning Primus and someone else makes a gesture (read a story where it was a circle over the spark, mimicking the Matrix). I want to know how they choose alt-modes, whether fliers are always flier and grounders always grounders and whether there's social tiers based on that. I want to know about their hierarchy, both before the war and in the factions. There's so much I want to know! Enough peeing on people, enough with the human gestures (snorting, spitting, arrrgh), enough with "Autobots are good because they like humans and Decepticons are bad because they're trying to restore their planet", I want to know about the robots! I am watching Transformers because it's about robots! DO YOU THINK I MIGHT WANT TO SEE MORE ABOUT ROBOTS?! aaaaahhhhhh

And that is why I write fanfic. :D

4) If there were only three types of meals you could eat for the rest of your life, what would they be?
Three types of meals... Well I pretty much am restricted to three types of meals. XD I can eat vegetables, poultry, and seafood. Can't eat anything out of a box, can't eat other meats, can't eat corn syrup. I'm lactose intolerant (but I eat cheese and yogurt anyway, they're low in lactose) and I'm extremely sensitive to caffeine. Can't eat processed sugars. So yeah - my answer is vegetables, poultry, and seafood. XD

5) If you suddenly got an all expenses paid trip to anywhere in the world, where would it be to?
You know, I'm not one of those people who wants to travel. I don't really want to see the Grand Canyon, I have little interest in the Caribbean, cruise ships sound boring... So I'm going to go with Pripyat. I really, really do want to visit Pripyat and Chernobyl. I am desperately intrigued by the biological stuff going on - I want to know if the mutations of the pines are genetic, or whether it's due to constant exposure to the cracked sarcophagi of the Red Forest. I want to visit that creepy ferris wheel, and I want to meet the people who live there. It's not a wasteland. It's teeming with life - plant and animal and human. It's beautiful and terrible.
lex: Longarm Prime complete with noodly appendages. (NOODLE ARMS)
Tagged by [personal profile] justbolts, [personal profile] spacehussy, and [personal profile] hellkitty! ...okay no I wasn't.

If you've been tagged, you must write your answers in your own LJ and replace any question that you dislike with a new question.
Tag 8 people. Don't refuse to do that. Don't tag who tagged you.


Have you ever considered the similarities between memes, viruses, chain letters, and personal belief systems including most major religions and dietary restrictions based on morality? Thus I say: I am sick, and I do not wish to pass on my germs. YOU SHALL NOT TAG.

See what I did there? heh heh. )
lex: (blah blah)
1. Are you a a "pantser" or a "plotter"?

I... think this question is dividing the fanfic world into PWP and... non-PWP. So I'd go with non-PWP, since I have written exactly three pornographic stories EVER. However, my writing rarely centers on a plot - rather, I focus on character interactions, with a particular focus on certain traits of those characters.

2. Detailed character sketches or "their character will be revealed to me as a I write"?

I tend to ponder a character for a very long time and then just start slipping into their head, writing little things about them until it feels right. This is also something I do regularly whenever I feel stalled, or even just if I'm having a good day (or a bad day) and want to share that feeling.

3. Do you know your characters’ goals, motivations, and conflicts before you start writing or is that something else you discover only after you start writing?

I try to discover as much of that as I can before writing, but a lot of it is revealed as I go. Whenever I hit a rough spot where things aren't working, I know that means I'm forcing the characters and I have to take a step back and reexamine their motivations. I never, ever know everything before I start writing - if I knew the story already, where would be the fun in telling it?

4. Books on plotting – useful or harmful?

Surely can't hurt, right? I was never trained as a writer, and I've never found by-the-book advice useful, but I know several skilled writers who have used that advice to great effect. My key advice: never stop writing. If something is stuck, write something else - maybe something related, like a character sketch, maybe an outline, just... don't stop writing. But don't force it either. If it feels wrong, it's not going to be enjoyable to read.

5. Are you a procrastinator or does the itch to write keep at you until you sit down and work?


I get the itch! When a story wants to be written, I have to write it. My poor memory means I have to hurry before it's gone for good. But when the writing is good, damn, is the writing good. I honestly think I'd hate taking drugs because it could never compare to the sheer pleasure of a good bout of writing.

6. Do you write in short bursts of creative energy, or can you sit down and write for hours at a time?


Totally depends on how much of the story is ready to be written.

7. Are you a morning or afternoon writer?

Doesn't matter in the least!

8. Do you write with music/the noise of children/in a cafe or other public setting, or do you need complete silence to concentrate?

It depends on the story. I've had stories that required a certain playlist, stories that required silence, stories that required a certain level of hubbub... Depends. Noise is a mood-setter, though it can be distracting.

9. Computer or longhand?

Always computer. I think far faster than my hands can keep up with a pen - technically faster than I can touch-type, too, but it's at least a little closer. I'll resort to pencil and paper if I absolutely have to but I really can't stand it.

10. Do you know the ending before you type Chapter One?

Never. Or if I thought I did, it changes completely by the time I get there. It's not unusual for the story to change utterly over the course of one scene. I suppose that could be the sign of a poor writer - I'd prefer to think it's the sign of a poor plotter. I am definitely terrible at plotting.

11. Editing – love it or hate it?

I adore editing. My work, someone else's work, doesn't matter! This, too, I learned by ear, so I tend to say silly things about the feel of stuff, and what the story is saying it wants to be and other ridiculous things along those lines. My writing has always felt like it comes from an external source, so the language I use to talk about it reflects that. But all told I am a vicious, perfectionist, unforgiving editor, and it never turns off.

Memememe~

Feb. 20th, 2010 12:37 pm
lex: (idk my bff megatron)
01. The first character I fell in love with: I would say Starscream because everyone's first love is Starscream, but to be honest... movie-verse Scorponok.

02. The character I never expected to love as much as I do now: Sari. She was so annoying at first! And now I adore her, because she is BADASS. It is so nice to see a strong female character even if she is a kid.

03. The character everyone else loves that I don't: Uh. Mirage, maybe? Don't hate him, just don't love him.

04. The character I love that everyone else hates: Huh, good question. I've seen a lot of people hate on Sunstreaker, but at the same time the Lamborghini twins get a lot of love, so... Can't really think of anyone. Longarm Prime, maybe?

05. The character I used to love but don't any longer: My love, it is infinite and unbounded. I only add love, I never take it away.

06. The character I would shag anytime: Any of them. Oh, I have to pick one... This is tough. Okay, if I had to pick just one... Skyfire. WHAAAAT DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT.

07. The character I want to be like: ...Longarm.

08. The character I'd slap: Michael Bay. No question. (He totally counts as a character because he had a cameo. SO THERE.)

09. A pairing that I love: Ratchet/Sideswipe/Sunstreaker/Prowl and any permutation thereof.

10. A pairing that I hate: Jazz/Prowl. Well, okay, not HATE - but it seems to attract poor writing like nothing else, and I can't stand lazy writing.

11. Favorite character: Don't make me do this. Every time I think I have a favorite one, I'm reminded of how much I adore someone else in a different way.

12. My five favorite characters: Sunstreaker, Megatron, Starscream, Shockwave, and Lockdown, in no particular order.

13. My five least favorite characters: Mudflap, Skids, Wheelie, movie!Jetfire, Blackarachnia.

14. Which character I am most like: Sunstreaker. Seriously. Feel free to back away slowly.

15. My deep, dark fandom secret: I'm terrified of the fandom. I love reading it all, I love writing for it, but damn am I scared of combining those two aspects.